to ensure myself a place on the to-watch list

here's a link to an article that really lays out the peril of checking your skepticism at the door when dealing with the propoganda machine. the claim that you have nothing to fear if you have nothing to hide just doesn't hold water; you aren't the one who decides what should be hidden. the terrorists are a much smaller group than the people who disagree with this administration's policies--a needle in a haystack versus (more than) half the haystack. the choice seems to be this: passively watch as bit by bit our liberties are taken away, or actively voice your concerns while you're still able...

always remember: Those willing to give up a little liberty for a little security deserve neither security nor liberty.--Benjamin Franklin

i don't know why i did it, i don't know why i enjoyed it, and i don't know why i'll do it again!

You Are Bart Simpson

Very misunderstood, most people just dismiss you as "trouble." Little do they know that you're wise and well accomplished beyond your years. You will be remembered for: starring in your own TV show and saving the town from a comet Your life philosophy: "I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I'll do it again!"

The Simpsons Personality Test

my plea to the media re: al zarqawi's death

dear media,

it seems american forces have killed the number one enemy in iraq. i get it, and for what it is i suppose it's good--at least they hit their target, and i won't argue that he wasn't a bad man. and early on it seemed that you were exercising a modicum of good taste, for which i applaud you. but it seems that you have given up good taste for the sensational. believe me, i'm not surprised, but also believe that i'm disgusted and would like to make a small request.

STOP PLASTERING HIS BLOATED DEAD MELON ALL OVER YOUR REPORTS! you said he was dead, and i understood. much like with saddam's sons, you seem to be getting some morbid jollies off of showing pictoral evidence of this death. i know you aren't trying to be respectful of al zarqawi or his family or his people, but you have trampled, spat and vomitted upon the line of good taste. and i for one don't need to see it when i'm watching/reading the news. i get it!

i could go on, but i think that sums it up pretty well.

with more respect than you're bestowing upon your audience,

leomange

has it really come to this?

just a brief rant about obesity, candy, and the illusion of corporate responsibility:

a quick disclaimer, i'm not a big candy consumer. but today i had an urge for some sugar to go with my lunch. 'hmm,' i thought, 'a coke? no, that's too much sugar. but i can just drink half?' the vending machine at my work had hershey's with almonds and mr. goodbars staring me down. 'alright, candy bar it is,' i decide. i choose the hershey's with almonds, grab a sugar-free soda, and set down to eat.

so i get to the end of my meal, and, fittingly, the candy bar, and there is some code inscribed inside the wrapper--the WrapperCash(tm) code! i can start banking points today! and below this exciting news is the message: 'Candy is a treat. Please consume in moderation.'

jeez, where to begin? a) the messages are conflicting--'collect points and earn prizes, but don't collect too many points, fatty!', b) do they actually expect binge candy-eaters to cut back thanks to their concern printed in their wrapper (as an ex-smoker, the surgeon general couldn't sway me off those bad-boys for many years, so my guess would be 'no'), and c) have we as a society really reached that point where we need to be told that candy shouldn't be a staple in our diets?

and it's 'c)' that i'm most concerned about. those psa commercials urging us to park farther away from our destinations and walk a few more steps?!?! or take stairs?

and here's the deal: i know we have reached that point as a society. my office spans three floors that are connected by stairwells. i can't tell you how many times i see people using the elevator to advance one floor. i'll do it once in a great while, but that's not until i've traversed the stairs several times. i also walk to work nine times out of ten, and rarely use the elevator at my apt (4th floor, though it helps that that elevator is scaaary), except when doing laundry.

and the people who use the stairs the least are generally the people who need to use them the most.

sheesh.

p.s. if you collect these WrapperPoints(tm), feel free to add these two points to your bank... but this offer is on a first come first served basis: XYFR AMTK EL3F at hersheys.com.

Mucousy Rigby

to the tune of 'Eleanor Rigby' by The Beatles

ah, look at all the mucky mucous
ah, spit out all the mucky mucous

leomange rigby, hocking and hacking and spitting the phlegm down the drain
allergies're lame
taking a shower, trying to clean out the crap from the night before
what is it for?

all the freakin' mucous
where did it all come from?
all the freakin' mucous
where does it all belong?

sudafed hazy, causing the day to be manic and crazy-insane
coffee seems tame.
look at him working, drugging up every four hours to get through the day
to feel okay.

all the freakin' mucous
where did it all come from?
all the freakin' mucous
where does it all belong?

ah, look at all the mucky mucous
ah, spit out all the mucky mucous

so comes the evening, leomange goes home, his nose gets all freakin' stuffed up
don't wanna stay up
smoke through the window, cigarette smokers, the neighbors who live downstairs
what do they care

all the freakin' mucous
where did it all come from?
all the freakin' mucous
where does it all belong?